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Any clever responses for this????


Sat, June 18, 2011 9:01 PM

I've always been a thin person, but since my 1st Crohn's flare up its harder to keep weight on& I loose weight when I have flare ups. I'm 5'9"ish, at my worst I think I was around 110, but most of the time I probably average 120, which isn't even underweight. I don't even think I look disgustingly thin, but people CONSTANTLY say things about my weight& its been bugging me lately. I've been gaining weight since my surgery, but just started going back to work& everybody's commenting on my weight loss again. I honestly haven't even bothered weighing myself & don't know at all how much I weigh right now, & I kinda don't care what I weigh right now either. People have actually told me that they wished they had a disease like mine so that they could loose a few pounds!! That's craziness!! I usually tell them that its not even something they want to joke about, and grueling excercise isn't nearly as bad as having IBD. I hear it all from "Oh you just LOOK sick(which is so unpleasant to hear when I'm actually feeling a lot better and starting to think that I am actually not looking sick anymore) to people listing umpteen million foods that I should be eating so that I gain weight "You just need a milkshake and cheeseburger!" Blah blah blah. I just tired of it. If I can be happy with myself, why can't everybody else? They can totally understand how comments about obese people can be hurtful, but can tell me all day how I'm a skeleton, and better be careful so that I don't just blow away. Plus they just grab at my stomach or legs or arms and squeeze and pinch away as they make all these comments. I usually just say "I just try to eat healthy, and let my doctors monitor my weight, trust me I'm not wasting away!!"  or, "Yeah I'm still a little on the skinny side, but I'm just glad to finally be feeling better." Iits the same people that no matter what always have some comment to make about my weight. How can I get my point across without being rude???

FPO neverending
Joined Dec 8, 2010

Wed, June 29, 2011 9:58 PM

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

Thank you for all of your replies... they're gonna get put to the test for sure this weekend due to some of the people I will be around =/.   At least I feel armed now!!!

FPO neverending
Joined Dec 8, 2010

Tue, June 28, 2011 3:37 PM

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

Just tell them that your secret to weight loss is spending half the day running to the toilet pooping it all out till you're raw. It's like a treadmill but a lot less pleasant.

 It's gross but they'll only ask once. May not be appropriate at the workplace depending on people/location, but it will be effective. Plus it may help shed some light on some of the discomforts we endure.

FPO bharner
Joined Jun 28, 2011

Mon, June 27, 2011 3:49 PM

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

I AM SO GLAD YOU POSTED THIS. Your story is so similar. I have heard it all. "What's your secret:?" " I want what you have." All types of BS. Before I was diagnosed I was 5'6" 220, druing treatment I went up to 240 after the surgery I was 104 (at my smallest). Yes, I went from borderline obese to underweight, but thats due to the fact that my body reacted terribly to all the medications and the surgeries. My body just couldn't handle it. Now 3 yrs later. I am FINALLY healthy and I am 5'6" 140 lbs! But I still feel a severe discomfort and anxiety when someone says "What happened to you" or asks "what diet are you on". Someone even asked for my # to "talk about my eating habbits later". Like I said its been 3 years since my surgery and I have come to terms with everything I have been through but I can not shake the constant discomfort and even slight anger sometimes when someone comments on my weight/ weight loss.

FPO tooyoungforthis
Joined Jun 27, 2011

Mon, June 27, 2011 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

Tell people that your weight is off-limits as a topic, and that discussing it gives you stress < which is unhealthy> .  Have a couple of conversation topics ready to go.  " I would rather talk about ......" is a great example.  People will get the picture if you refuse to participate in that train of discussion.
  It's hard, I know.  We have a cultural problem, and people think that its okay to comment on someone's size or weight( at any range of the scale) whether you are family, friend, coworker, or complete stranger... and that it's a positive feel-good conversation opener. 
Hang in there.  we understand.  even if the world conspires against you

FPO katya
Joined Sep 15, 2010

Sun, June 19, 2011 10:54 PM

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

i have the same problem as well. i  usually try to smile and change to another subject. when they pushing too far, i tell them follow the "plate diet" just to get some personal space. it is better to think people asked because they don't know or understand. maybe god punish them to have 15 extra pounds to loose.

FPO kicking
Joined Apr 14, 2011

Sun, June 19, 2011 9:37 AM

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

I would say " Thank God everyday you wake up without Crohns or Colitis because if you had it you wouldnt ask foolish questions" and then i would walk away. I guarantee you every single person that says comments to you, has there flaw. Ask them to look in the mirror before they begin opening their mouths

FPO juan609
Joined Jun 8, 2011

Sat, June 18, 2011 10:54 PM

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

this is what you say

i have the problem under control and if you had crohns or collitic you would understand and sense you don't have it you don't understand how hard keeping and gaining weight is so im sorry if my weight bothers you but i really cant help it.

you then drop the conversion. this way they get the idea you don't feel like talking about it and it comes out as a polite but firm answer.

FPO samantha smith
Joined Jun 18, 2011

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