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teen emotional wellness


Wed, November 12, 2008 9:18 PM

I am the mom of a wonderful teenage boy who was diagnosed with Crohn's in September of this year.  He, as well as my husband and myself are really struggling with keeping him healthy emotionally.  He is dealing with a great deal of fear and anger.  I am scared for him and not quite sure what to do to help him through this.  Is there anyone with suggestions?

FPO swimmom
Joined Nov 12, 2008

Mon, November 17, 2008 11:56 AM

 Reply posted for sandpiper.

Thank you so much for your advice.  Many of the items you mentioned we are already doing with our son so it was reassuring for me to read.  We'll just keep plugging away and keep praying!

FPO swimmom
Joined Nov 12, 2008

Thu, November 13, 2008 4:36 PM

 Reply posted for swimmom.

First of all, I feel for you.  My 13 yo son has CD.  A couple of things I learned: 

1) they do get angry, and I think its normal for them to be angry with us since were closest to them.  The anger got better once he was feeling better and saw that his life didnt change that much.  (The first few months were bad, but now we are lucky that he's feeling pretty well).

2) Listening works better than talking  (e.g. don't say you understand, because as my son reminds me, you may love me but you can't know what it's like).

3) see if there are friends he can open up to.  I said to someone else in this forum that I was surprised how secretive my normally chatty, friendly, self-confident kid became.  Big difference once a few of his close friends found out and he saw that they didnt treat him differently.

4) let him think he is making the medical decisions, even if you are.  The sense of control is incredibly important to my kid.  (Our GI is good about this).  As a corrolary, don't make too many excuses for him--you don't want him to learn that this disease is an excuse--he can control his disease (at least most of the time), it shouldn't control him.

5) try not to ask about his GI symptoms every day!  This is a hard one for me...my son has to remind me not to...

Hope this helps.  Good luck...it is not easy...I hope your son does well...

 

FPO sandpiper
Joined Oct 12, 2008

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