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My "boss" does not understand!


Tue, April 14, 2009 9:49 AM

Greetings,

   I have had Crohn's for many years and actually do quite well.   Some days are good and I forge ahead, go to work, own up to my responsibilities as best I can.   Some days, not so good.   Being on task, on target at work can be difficult during these "not so good" days.  My close co-workers understand, ( not really but they still help me as I will need to run to the bathroom a lot), and they do  not ask a gazillion questions.   They just come to my aide, because they are my friends.

   My boss?  Well, that's another story.  Without going into a lot of details, she knows that I have some health issues.   When I need to take a few days off because of a flare up, I just cannot get any compassion or "how are you" coming to me.   I don't want a lot of attention from her, I just need to be feeling that I do not need to "watch my back" when it comes keeping my job.

    Anyone relate to this?  Does anyone have a boss who recognizes health problems in an employee, but also respects that most of the time does their job well?

Thanks,

Jeanne Piper 

FPO 2inspire
Joined Apr 14, 2009

Sat, May 30, 2009 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for kickinash21.

Hi K-21,

  Thanks for your reply.  I was thinking the same about FMLA, too.     The fallout from Crohn's with me is arthritis~in my hands, and Fibro, so say some drs.   Wow!  I really hurt.  On top of all this I have a boss, (principal), that really singles me out.  My stress level goes up trying to please her.  I cannot make her happy, even on summer break......she's always after me.

 Thanks for just listening/reading.

FPO 2inspire
Joined Apr 14, 2009

Wed, May 27, 2009 1:45 PM

 Reply posted for 2Inspire.

I TOOK FMLA INTERMITTENT LEAVE

I AM CURRENTLY ON CIMZIA. SEVERE PAINS AND BLEEDING NOW THO. DOING ANOTHER COLONOSCOPY FRIDAY.

FPO kickinash21
Joined May 27, 2009

Fri, April 24, 2009 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for 2Inspire.

I totally understand!!  I had this same problem from my boss about a year ago.  You deff. need to get on FMLA just to have a leg to stand on.  There is not a GI Doc out there that wouldnt sign those papers for you.  What helped me some was just printing off docs, mainly from this site, and giving them to my boss so he could see how devastating these conditions can truly be.  I think he didnt believe me half the time or thought I was making a mountain out of a mole hill!  I have since transfered to a new location, within the same company, and my boss and fellow co workers are super understanding of what a battle it can be just to get through the day.  Some people are just a-holes, and its not in their nature to understand or care about another human being :-)  I hope this helps.  But deff. get some FMLA papers on file ASAP!  Wishing you the best :-)

FPO breezy317
Joined Jan 24, 2009

Wed, April 15, 2009 11:19 AM

 Reply posted for grabowski.

I have a daughter who has UC.  When I was reading this post, it just burns me up that fellow co workers and bosses are so insensitive to this issue.  My husband is an attorney in CA so I asked him about it.  He said in CA UC/CD is a recognized disability.  He said for the people out of CA who have questions about their rights to contact their Congressman and that office can tell you your rights.  It's unreal that there is no empathy towards others and people can't understand something until they develope a condition.  I wish people could walk in someone else's shoes for a change. 

FPO ez
Joined Nov 9, 2008

Wed, April 15, 2009 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for 2Inspire.

I'm brand new to the boards today and when I saw the subject of your post I had to read it because I kinda feel like you except my co-workers really don't understand. I have ulcerative colitis (since 1996 now).  My co-workers keep telling me I need to have something done about this because I can't live with it forever.  They don't understand that unless a cure is found I will live with it forever and I'm not ready for surgery!  My boss I feel does not understand and doesn't want to.  I'm an Admin for about 9 people and she believes you need to be there to be there at their every beck and call!  If her Admin is not at her desk then my boss is calling me and then if I'm in the bathroom which is usually the case she says I'm never at my desk and the hardest person to find.  Keep in mind she rarely calls me so how would she know I'm never at my desk?  She wants me there at 8 sharp.  I just can't do it.  I will never be able to make it to work on time - not at this job or any other job.  I have to sit in a lot of traffic to get to work and it gives me great anxiety just to get to work every morning and I have my bathroom stops along the way.  Does she understand - I don't think so.  I live every day worried I'm going to lose my job over what I have.  My company is in the middle of a merger and I keep thinking - I have FMLA paperwork on file but they could just use the excuse of a lay off to get rid of me.  So I worry all the time!

 

Michele

FPO grabowski
Joined Apr 15, 2009

Tue, April 14, 2009 9:27 PM

 Reply posted for asohn.

Sadly, I had to get a note from my doctor allowing me, yes ALLOWING me, 10 extra minutes a day to use the restroom.  I also filed for FMLA, family medical leave act, for my time off so my work cannot touch me whatsoever.  You may want to look into it.  If not, there are places you can turn to to get this resolved.  If they deny you restroom useage, it is against the law.  Cover your butt (no pun intended!) and get the note from the doctor.  At least it is in your personnel records. 

FPO aca11
Joined Mar 3, 2009

Tue, April 14, 2009 9:54 AM

 Reply posted for 2Inspire.

You might need to talk to someone in your HR department- you might need a note or something from your dr to verify your condition and allow you to go to the restroom if you need.  Unfortunately alot of people that don't have this don't understand.  Hang in there- that has got to be tough to try to go to work and get absolutely no understanding.....

FPO asohn
Joined Dec 22, 2008

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