colitis flare and sick spouse........
Thu, May 27, 2010 12:00 AM
okay...having a flare for about 10 days now.......hoping/thinking it is finally starting to settle some............I'm just so exhausted....my joints, muscles and especially my right leg are killing me this time as well......my husband is very sick...he is in renal failure, had a bad back, needs knees replaced and very obese...........He cannot hardly walk , is on dialysis 3 days week, and cannot help me.in fact I have to help him more and more with daily things most take for granted.........plus try to encourage him to keep going to treatments, eat right (which is so complex and different than I need to eat) .........we're a mess......anyway just trying to keep going, keep working my job and not cry so much......it's hard right now......I'm very tired.......
Joined Oct 24, 2009
Wed, June 09, 2010 5:16 PM
Reply posted for taw.
You didn't mess up with your friend, they just weren't up to the challenge. Nobody's fault, just a tough situation that not everyone is going to be able to handle. If your employer offers an Employee Assistance Program as part of the benefits be sure to call them. It doesn't cost you anything to call, they may have some basic advise for you and they will be able to refer you to local services (some free, some fee based) that may help you. Find or start a support group to be a part of as well. Best wishes.
Joined Jun 27, 2008
Tue, June 08, 2010 8:07 PM
Reply posted for taw.
If there is any way at all to see some type of mental health worker, even for a few visits that can really help. Periodically I go as it provides me with someone who is objective and will listen, even if they can't change the facts. I suppose it's like a paid friend of sorts but letting out my fears and concerns to someone I pay allows me to treat my friends and family as friends and family and not burden them with my problems. I often get overwhelmed and scared when I'm sick and having no place to turn adds to the burden
I also don't call my friends all that often which allows me to build up a number of "good" events in my life to discuss so I can stay away from the health issues.
Stress is not good for IBD people, well too much stress isn't good for anyone, so diffusing it in some way helps.
Joined Sep 1, 2008
Sat, June 05, 2010 12:00 AM
Reply posted for taw.
thanks so much Claire's mom........it is nice for someone to understand every now and then..
my closest friend just abandoned me...said they were there for me but my meltdowns between my colitis and my husbands illness were too much..they said I was dragging them down and just turned their back on me..if I ever get them back as a friend I have learned my lesson...I'll post my worries here on this site and not involve my friend..but I don't think they'll be my friend now...I really messed up..
Joined Oct 24, 2009
Sat, May 29, 2010 10:09 AM
Reply posted for taw.
Taw - I'm so sorry to hear what a rough time you all are having. Do you have any family or close friends that could give you a break? It sounds like you are carrying the load. In the meantime, you'll be in my prayers.
Claire's Mom
Joined Jul 20, 2009
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