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the blame game


Mon, June 28, 2010 12:00 AM

I am so sick of being blamed for being sick!  I feel like there's a real tendency for the medical system to tell people an illness is all about stress and anxiety if the health issue is not very well understood.  I have run into this before and ran into it last week with a doctor. 

I don't know what other people think... Maybe some might disagree with me or have not experienced this...

I just notice a real pattern with poorly understood diseases...  Until the cure is found or the exact defect, it feels like there is a real blame game.  And I am sick of it.

FPO zinnia
Joined May 13, 2010

Wed, July 07, 2010 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for debbates101.

debbates101,

That is really how I feel, too.  You said it perfectly.  Thanks for making me feel less alone with this stuff.  I really appreciate it.

Take care,

Zinnia

FPO zinnia
Joined May 13, 2010

Tue, July 06, 2010 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for Zinnia.

I just wish there were some way for these doctors to look at themselves and see how negatively they can affect us. They think that we have a negative effect on our disease because we cause ourselves anxiety and stress, yet they don't even consider how they affect us. They dismiss us, they dismiss our symptoms, they don't try hard enough to figure out what is wrong. How is that not supposed to make us feel terrible about ourselves? How is that not supposed to cause anxiety? It's so easy for them just to blame it on something else. If they can't take care of it, well then you must need to take more xanax. Or you must need a visit to your OB/GYN. How about you finish YOUR job first before you start shoving me off on other doctors? I don't understand why they wouldn't want to get to the bottom of it. When I have a problem at my job, I keep searching and searching until I figure out what caused the problem so I can fix it. I just don't get it!

FPO debbates101
Joined Jun 23, 2010

Tue, July 06, 2010 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for debbates101.

Hey debbates101,

That must be really tough.  And, it is so ridiculous and unfair that a doctor would take you off the medicine for your UC because you have bipolar.  I'm really sorry you dealt with that.

I hate it when doctors think they know more about a person's emotional state than the patient.  When I was told I had IBS I was 13.  The doctor put me on some stupid anti anxiety medicine that made me feel really horrible and did nothing to help my extremely uncomfortable and embarrassing digestive issues.   It was not right but that seems to be how it is.  Maybe some day things will be different.

FPO zinnia
Joined May 13, 2010

Sun, July 04, 2010 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for Zinnia.

OMG! I could go on for hours about this! I also have bipolar and I'm on medication for it, but it's pretty mild. Try going in to a doctor w/ THAT stigma! As soon as they see that, their whole attitude toward you changes. You have pain? Oh, yea, right, they can't see it so it's just in my head. I actually had a doctor try to take me off all of my UC meds and put me on antipsychotics! My psychiatrist flipped! That doctor made me feel so bad about myself it sent me into a depression--I didn't leave my house for 2 weeks.

FPO debbates101
Joined Jun 23, 2010

Wed, June 30, 2010 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for Joe.

Thanks Joe.  I really like what you said.  It made me smile.

Zinnia

FPO zinnia
Joined May 13, 2010

Wed, June 30, 2010 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for PyroZack.

hey pyrozack,

not so much diet or religion, but doctors telling me my illness is about stress.  for example, last week i was in to see this doctor at my doctor's office about something.  i also have eczema and she glomed on to it, talking about how crohn's and eczema have a real relationship to stress.  she is wrong.  totally wrong.  and it is so unfair to say that.  none of my illnesses have any thing to do with stress.  i have had them since i was born.  she was just a *** .  but it made me feel really bad. 

i ran into this also when i was first having really bad digestive issues and was told it was ibs.  they told me it was all stress and anxiety.  i dealt with this diagnosis for years before i was diagnosed with crohn's.

sorry if this is totally too much info for you... guess i am venting a little here...  wondering, also, what your experiences with being blamed were about.

thanks for listening,

zinnia

FPO zinnia
Joined May 13, 2010

Tue, June 29, 2010 5:59 PM

 Reply posted for Zinnia.

You are correct in your assumption. The next time a doctor starts down that road just say to him, "IF YOU CANNOT FIGURE OUT WHAT IS MEDICALLY WRONG WITH ME ALL I WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU IS THE WORDS----ETIOLOGY UNKNOWN or, I DO NOT KNOW". 

                                Joe

FPO joe
Joined Oct 24, 2019

Tue, June 29, 2010 3:54 AM

 Reply posted for Zinnia.

If you don't mind me asking, in what way are they blaming you?  Referring to diet and saying you ask for it or some such or for some sort of religious reason?  'Cause basically I can comment on both :D

FPO pyrozack
Joined Aug 24, 2009

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