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trying to get coworkers to understand


Tue, December 21, 2010 1:42 PM

I'm at my wits end at work, to the point where I would quit, if I didn't need the insurance.  I'm tired of the snide comments, the laughter, and the blatant disregard for my feelings.  I realize that when I have to use the bathroom, it smells.  I get that.  I just don't get why they have to make a big deal out of it.  I can't go to "the boss" because "the boss" is one of the main problems, and the rest of the employees take their cue from her.  I feel like I should have a educational seminar about it, so maybe they'd understand that it's not just a case of me eating Mexican food for lunch, but that any and everything that I put into my mouth will make me sick.  It's gotten to the point where I've stopped eating, just so I don't have to deal with as much humiliation.  I've lost almost 30pounds over the past 9 months because of this.  And of course, the stress of it all just makes the flare-ups worse.  Does anybody have any good advice on how to approach this matter?

FPO djb4fsu
Joined Dec 21, 2010

Fri, January 21, 2011 11:58 PM

 Reply posted for djb4fsu.

I am so sorry that you work with stupid people.  Most folks would figure out that picking on you is not okay once they knew of your diagnosis.

Take the boss privately asside and telling him/her that the taunting that they are participating in is hurtful and is creating a  "hostile environment" (yes, that is a legal term and one that human resources and lawyers will use).  Once this is done (and you may have already done this) then you do need to document the times people say things, especially the boss, and specific quotes of what is said. This documentation needs to be submitted to your Human Resources Office and/or to a lawyer.  You also need to make sure you are documented at your company as a protected person under ADA.  Crohns is considered a disability and your doctor will be able to fill out a very short form to confirm this.

I have invested in a product call Poo-Pourri that I carry with me in my pocket that one can spray in the bowl on the water prior to using it and it really does cut down on the escaping odor.  I got the small 1.75 oz pocket size to carry with daily and then a larger bottle I keep at home for refills.  It makes me less conscientious about my experiences in public places. It isn't so much about being picked on for me, but about me taking some control of something that is not within my control all the time. 

FPO petlover
Joined Jan 20, 2011

Wed, January 12, 2011 1:00 AM

 Reply posted for djb4fsu.

I just wanted to say I am so sorry for what you are going thru at your job...I have had Crohn's for 18 years and know how hard it is to work when you are feeling bad...I can't even believe your co-workers are acting like this! Is there a bathroom somewhere further away you could use- like in another building? I just feel awful that they are not understanding...I know my response is a little late on here- but have you tried meeting with your boss to explain all about your disease? That is what I have always done at my jobs...I know it can be embarrassing & hard to talk about...but my co-workers listened when I explained my situation. Well I hope things are better for you!! Hang in there!

FPO stepho24
Joined Aug 15, 2008

Fri, December 24, 2010 11:52 PM

 Reply posted for djb4fsu.

If it gets intolerable, you can also consider consulting an attorney (employment/discrimination law). Remember that you are covered under the ADA and the fact that your co-workers (and boss) are doing those things can rise to the level of a hostile work environment. 


In the meantime, remember to take care of yourself - that is the most important thing you can do. Best of luck to you.

FPO cnowlen
Joined Nov 3, 2010

Tue, December 21, 2010 4:10 PM

 Reply posted for djb4fsu.

I am sorry to hear you are having such a terrible time at work.   There are several things you can do to maybe help out the situation.  First, you need to eat.  I know food plays a huge role, figure out which foods send you sailing, and get a better idea of which ones work well.   Give your body  chance to recooperate by being kind to your gut.  My daughter does very well with eating smaller meals more frequently, and snacking in between.  The "grazing" helps her fuel her body through the day w/o getting too overwhelmed.  It may help you too.

I'd donate a can of air freshner to the restroom.   Don't even mention it, just leave it in there.  Let's face it, you don't have to have CD/UC for #2 to smell.....don't let them fool you, their's doesn't smell like roses!    You could also print out a handout to educate the office.   Why not suggest a casual Friday fundraiser.....send the $ to Camp Oasis, which is a camp for our kids.....they could always use the money.  

Finally, hold your head up high, and don't let them get the best of you!

Good luck

Lizzies Mom

FPO lizzies mom
Joined Sep 9, 2009

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