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Goofy Post Surgery Experience

Fri, September 03, 2010 10:14 AM

So I want to add a little humor to the surgery section here. I didn't think this was funny at the time, but about 3 years have passed(surgery 2/13/07) and now I reflect on it and it is funny!

I was just waking up from all that happy juice the docs sent chugging through my veins, I was regaining my senses, feeling the dull ache, hearing the heart monitor, knowing I was in a semi dim room....

Then, just like fingernails on a chalkboard, this very annoying nurse who wouldn't shut up started permeating my senses!

My throat hurt and she would not stop trying to get me to talk back to her. If I could have talked I would have said something nasty, trust me. Then I would have blamed it on the meds.

During surgery they have to intubate you to put you on a respirator as the sedation is a muscle relaxant and stops you from breathing on your own. Same with the eyelids, mine had to be taped down.

Unfortunately a very inept nurse taped down my eyelids all right but scratched my cornea so that hurt too! The things I put up with in order to regain my health!

The obnoxious nurse asked me why I didn't talk and I felt like flipping her off, honestly. The RNs KNOW that patients like me get intubated and all that happy stuff, but what was brewing in my mind then were things I could not say and get away with in a normal state of mind.

I still think this is wickedly funny-my blood pressure went up and after a dose of medicine the obnoxious nurse said she couldn't figure out why my BP had shot up so quick!

I soothed myself by imagining myself doing all sorts of nasty things to get her to shut up and that helped a lot. I'm 4 eyed and I didn't have my specs then so I didn't know what she looked like, so I imagined her like a mouthy vampire and shoved a stake in her overdeveloped giant face!

Any other goofy experiences? I once started to see things on morphine back in 2004-it was so entertaining and I wasn't in any pain! :)

laura 6mp
Joined Aug 31, 2010

Thu, September 30, 2010 11:39 AM

Reply posted for Laura 6MP.

Thank goodness in all my surgeries I have actually been able to express my opinion to the silly nurses! And then I do blame the drugs!!

My goofy surgery experiences is a couple days later when I am cruising on the button pump of Dilaudid - I hallucinate! I imagined country music playing in my room, I told my husband about some of our friends and an incident that never ever happened, I imagined people in my room that weren't there! Turns out I was a tiny bit overdosed - nothing super dangerous and it could have been scary - but instead it was entertaining to my worried friends and family and rather fun for me!

heidiferg
Joined Aug 18, 2008

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