Community Forum

Hello,

I am taking a group of brand new college freshman on a camping trip this weekend. One of the students revealed to me yesterday that she has Crohn's Disease and "cannot camp." The class and the camping trip are based on the idea that cooperation and creative problem solving together with a positive attitude might help students begin to address their own needs as well as the problems and concerns of the wider community. I was hesitant to accept the student's assertion that camping is not possible for her but I did give her control over whether or not she would join the rest of the class for the trip. Additionally I told her she could drive separately and leave early, if she thought it necessary. There are bathrooms with flush toilets in the campgrund and she knows she would not be required to be far away from them at any time. The young lady thought about it over night and decided not to attend. I believe she is concerned the trip will be too much and will  cause her illness to flare up and interfere with her adjustment to college. I want to give her all the latitude and support I can but do not want her to unecessarily isolate herself from opportunities, this weekend or in the future. She will suffer no official consequences for not attending the outing but I thought posting here for feedback might help me do a better job handling this situation. Thanks for any advice you can give!

 Reply posted for maiaj.

I am very happy to hear you tried to include the young lady, and gave her the time and space to decide on her own if she was up for the camping trip.  I am 43 years old, and was diagnosed in my early 20's, back in 1995.  Having Crohn's is like others said, not just someone who has to go to the bathroom alot.  When one is having a flare up, it really is not a decision of having flushing toilets near.  The urge can hit at any moment and if you are not right there, at that time within a few feet from a toilet, yes, you can have an accident.  I am sure she will prosper and learn better more how to deal with her Crohn's as the rest of us do, and kudos to you, to take the time to understand her situation with the Crohn's. 

 Reply posted for Hockey Rocks.

I was recently diagnosed with crohns(about 3 weeks ago) but I have been dealing with the symptoms for a very long time(over a year). In the coarse of that year I dealt with the longest flare ever. I still traveled but it was with a great deal of stress and anxiety and the trips were only 2 hours away from my home. One trip in particular was a big group trip with friends and it lead to some VERY embarrassing situations. They are friends and didn;t judge me or make fun of me but for me personally it was embarrassing. We were set up in a fancy hotel/indoor waterpark so there was always access to bathrooms but that wasn't the point. Sometimes your body only alows a few seconds to run to the bathroom. It happened to me while at breakfast on this trip and I ended up having an accident so I rushed back to the hotel room, trying to cover up any smell or stains that may have been easily seen. I can only imagine how much more embarrassed I'd be if I were a new freshman with a bunch of new students who didn't know me to well...let alone don't know of a disease I would rather keep more private. She knows what is best for her, she may be missing an opportunity but at the same time going may be risking a lot more than the opportunity. Honestly I respect her decision she didn't feel forced to spend the weekend with the class although it may have been preferred, I respect that she took thought into it and she came up with what is right for her. Sometimes I wish I would have stood my ground when it came to some of the traveling I did during my flares.

 Reply posted for maiaj.

Shargen2 was right on and I feel the same way.  I have had Crohns since '87, I am 44.  The past few years have been preety eventfull, abpout 7 operations, and the only way to get control over it was to get a permanant Colostomy.  The was the smartest thing I could have done.  She will know whats best on waht she can and can not do.  It seems like you are trying, but it will only make her feel more frustrated and isolated and she is not being heard when making a decision.  I know this from experiance, my familly doesnt fully get it and so fourth, Also, and very importantly, people who know little to nothig about Crohns get way to hung up on its someone who just has to go to the bathroom allot.  The can be many cronic issues that go along with it that she simply does not want to have to go into detail, I know the feeling.  The disease is overwhelming enough as it is when you have to plan every detail through the course of the day.  Its seems like you really want to help, so the best thing to do is respect her decison, also, and this is very important.  I know with me, I am very reluctant to travel due to it gets you away from your home base, sort of your comfort zone.  If you leave that, it just increases your anxiety greatly, thus being social can be brutal, when people around you dont understand, and might even be judgmental. For example,  why is this person so moody, or unsocial or tense.  She will know when she is ready while getting control of the Crohns, and I'm sure will be more outgoing.  You did the right thing by seeking advise from people who know, All the best!

 Reply posted for maiaj.

Dealing with a chronic illness like Crohn's disease is really hard.  It can impact life in tremendous ways, and make fun things extremely stressful.  I have found it very hard to travel, especially with school groups.  (I am a college student)  I eat different food than other people and often have to eat on a different sceduale.  Frequent bathroom trips and just not feeling good add to the stress.  And, often young people are not very understanding or fun to be around when you feel sick. 

If people could be more understanding, less judgmental, and more flexible it would allow people with Crohn's disease (or any chronic illness) to participate more.  Please be patient with this woman because she is probably doing the best she can.

 Reply posted for maiaj.

After living with this disease for over 30 years, I can tell you she needs to make her on decision.  I know that you are asking so you can support her with her disease, but from experience I know she needs to decide.  There is so much about this disease that can really tear you down.  I think that supporting her decision is the best support you can give her.

 Reply posted for maiaj.

It is not as simple as having access to flush toilets. It is not something that you can put in a jar and label. The young lady knows best what she can do and can't do because of her IBD. Depending on the severity of the IBD at the time dictates the social activity, energy output, coping skills, mental stability and attitude. Until you have IBD you can't imagine how difficult it is to function normally at times. Listen to what the young lady says. Well meaning people like yourself only complicate the situation. Thank you for coming here and for trying to understand. Thank you.

                                          Joe  

 Reply posted for maiaj.

Go to the archive traval topic titled "Helpfull tips for travel please read. " It talks about a Product called the Biffy Bag which is a disposable toilet that fits in your pocket. My friend swears by it and carries one in her purse. She said it comes with everything you need including Peace of Mind. Hope this helps.

 Reply posted for maiaj.

I think it is wonderful that you are concerned about your student.  Hopefully she will become more involved as she adjusts to student life.  I wish I had some tips for you.  Read all you can on Crohn's and read the posts on this forum.  It will help you understand some of her challenges and fears. 

Breezy